They say we should all live a life with no regrets but honestly, do any of us live that way? Regrets are completely natural as we often make wrong choices. There are plenty of moments I look back on and think ‘if only I did that differently, if only I didn’t do that’ and my all time favourite… ‘if only I’d known what I know now.’ Yeah sure, I’d often have my mum giving me advice and telling me everything would work itself out but I didn’t always believe her, especially as a stroppy teenager.
1+1 doesn’t always = 2
I bet you’re thinking ‘what are you talking about? Yes it does’ but what I mean is, not every situation is black and white. An example of this is when I was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome) and my first thoughts were ‘I’ll never know what it’s like to be pregnant….I’m never going to be a mum’ because when you’re told something is wrong with that particular area, you assume the worst. I remember rushing out of the doctors and breaking down in tears. After days of researching it, speaking to family & friends, I realised I can still get pregnant, sure it may be a little trickier but still possible. Next time I find myself in a situation similar to this whether it’s health related or not, I’ll take a deep breath and dig a little deeper before completely losing my mind.
I’m not going to lie, I’ve spent hours and hours, years even, scrolling through Facebook, Instagram and magazines, comparing myself to celebrities, friends and sometimes even family. Comparing yourself is often a slippery road to jelousville, a horrible town located just outside of resentment city. The sooner you appreciate that there will always be someone who appears to have their shit a bit more together than you do.
And enjoy the ride! There are large parts of my life that felt rushed, like my finger was constantly on the fast forward button. There were even times I’d sleep for 15 hours+ just to waste a day away; the thought of this now makes me feel sick and now when anybody asks me ‘do you miss school?’ My answer is ABSOLUTELY. I wish more than anything I appreciated those little moments, walking down the corridor with friends, the constant laughter, rocking that care free attitude. Sure it wasn’t easy but life never is. Life is precious and something we take for granted everyday. So slow your road, grab yourself a cuppa and take it all in.
Know your self-worth
This is something up to this day I still struggle with but I know that I’m a lot closer today than I was when I was younger. Throughout my childhood, right up to my early twenties, I had no respect for myself. I’d get involved with people I knew would bring nothing but darkness into my life. Whilst they abused me mentally and sometimes physically, I convinced myself that’s exactly what I deserved and was put on this earth for. I’m now 25 and more cautious of who I let into my life and how I’m treated.
Forgiveness is key
From stealing my plastic doll in nursery to spreading a nasty rumour about me; I’d hold a grudge against you. This sort of links with point one. Not every situation is black and white and there are times you need to put yourself into someone else’s shoes to see why they did something or handled something in a particular way; by doing this you should be able to forgive. Now I’m not saying you need to forget and it may change your perception of that person forever but it’s better to find peace and close the door than to leave that door full of negativity open.